Hence when I realized just how much being on this team was hurting her, I let her quit.
I let her do what I’ve only recently learned to do: is how to cut people and things out of her life that doesn’t make her happy.
I understand that team sports teach many valuable lessons about life not being fair, and you can’t always be the best at everything, and not everyone is going to like you.
My kid has already learned those lessons. In spades. She doesn’t need them shoved down her throat every day. Sometimes, things should just be fun, and sometimes things shouldn’t be so dang hard.
Sports is one of those things.
She loves volleyball. She hated playing on this team. So let’s be done. Let’s just be done.
Life’s too short.
Obviously, there’s a line there. There’s always going to be stuff you don’t love doing, and you’ll have to spend time with people you don’t enjoy, and there will be goals that are extremely hard to reach. You can’t walk away from everything.
However if you can walk away from someone or something that makes you unhappy, that takes the light out of your eyes, that makes you feel you aren’t valued or that you don’t matter, why don’t you?
As adults, we are afraid to walk away. We are programmed to think things are supposed to be hard and at times, really friggin’ suck. We’re taught that people are imperfect, so we stop expecting people to treat us the way we deserve to be treated. We’re told there are no fairy tales, no Happily Ever After, so we live less than our happiest life because we think this is as good as it gets.
I wasted so much time in a career that made me miserable and with people who did the same.
So as a mother, I want my daughter to understand the importance of hard work and dedication, of sacrifice and sticking it out. But I also want her to understand when it’s ok to quit.
She handled herself with grace when talking to her coaches. She let them know her heart was not in it, and never whined or complained or cast blame.
On the way home from that game, she seemed relieved. I told her I was proud of her. All I’ve ever wanted was for her to be happy. That’s all any parent wants.
Empowering her at 15 to recognize when a situation isn’t right for her will hopefully prevent her from wasting time in a career that makes her miserable or with people who do the same.
If you feel like you’re stuck in a career you don’t love, or working with people who don’t treat you with respect, or in relationships of any sort that don’t make you better, it’s really okay to quit. Because life truly is too short.
my kid has been just miserable.
While I was contemplating, I heard the voices of other parents and great coaches who talk about powering through the tough times and building your mental strength and it’s not about playing time and you shouldn’t be a quitter.
And I thought why not?
My kid has had more than her share of tough times. She’s had to suck it up and power through far more by 15 than I’ve had to by 45. She’s mentally tough. She’s not a quitter.
When is it okay to walk away?
I’m firmly in the “life’s too short” camp, and over the last 6 years, I’ve cut people and things out of my life if they don’t make me happy. After far too long in a profession that didn’t fill me up, I quit. I walked away and I’ve never looked back.
And I’m much happier as a result...
- cultural events
- appreciating art
- taking classes
- computers and video games
- reading
- independent sports such as backpacking, running marathons or swimming
An INTJ personality is best described as an analytical problem solver and has a strong desire to improve systems and processes with their innovative ideas. INTJs are talented at finding possibilities for improvement, be it at work, at home or in themselves.
Those with INTJ personality are often intellectual, and as such, they enjoy logical reasoning and complex problem-solving. INTJs approach life by making an analysis of the theory behind what they see. They are typically focusing inwards and do their own study of the world around them.
Someone with an INTJ personality is attracted to logical systems and aren’t comfortable with the unpredictable nature of other people and their emotions. INTJs are mostly independent and are selective about whom they have relationships with. They prefer to associate with people who they find intellectually stimulating.
INTJ CharacteristicsINTJ stands for:
Introversion (I) – prefer to work alone.
Intuition (N) – looks at the big picture and focuses on abstract information rather than concrete details.
Thinking (T) – puts an emphasis in logic and objective information than subjective emotions.
Judging (J) – prefer their world be controlled and ordered which means they love planning well in advance.
- Reading.
- Cultural Events.
- Art Appreciation.
- Computer and Video Games.
- Independent Sports such as Swimming, Backpacking or Running Marathons.
Given their excellence at creating and implementing innovative solutions to analytical problems, they are best suited as:
- Accountant
- Mathematician
- Architect
- Computer Hardware Engineer
- Economist
- Computer Programmer
INTJ personality types are characterized by the introverted (I), intuitive (N), thinking (T) and judging (J) psychological functions. As analytical problem solvers, they like to formulate ideas that help improve systems and processes. Be it at work, at home or within themselves, INTJs have a knack for seeing possibilities for improvement.
As an intellectual, a person with INTJ loves logical reasoning and complex problem solving. Analyzing the theory behind what they see is how they approach life. Most of the time though, they are focused inward – studying the world around them alone with their thoughts.
Being drawn to logical systems, INTJs are not so comfortable with the unpredictable nature of people and their emotions. A person with INTJ personality tends to be independent and selective about whom they have relationships with – they prefer to mingle with people they find intellectually stimulating.
Take a look at our open positions ideal for INTJs and submit your resume to us now. INTJ CareerResearch on INTJs reveal they are among the personality types with the highest income. Majority of those who belong to this type are MBA students and female small business owners. They are most likely found in scientific or technical fields, computer occupations and legal professions.
INTJs distinguishes themselves in the workplace by being able to create and implement innovative solutions to analytical problems. They are naturally able to see improvements within complex systems. As organized and determined personalities, they can get their ideas for change implemented.
At ease with abstraction and theory, INTJs are satisfied when they get to turn their ideas into reality. Individuals with the INTJ personality type prefer working alone or with a small team. They take measured, strategic steps when implementing change.
An INTJ personality enjoys working with logical systems they can understand in depth. Understanding complex ideas is a challenge they enjoy and they are dedicated to understanding how to improve the way things work.
The typical working environment for an INTJ is logical, efficient, structured and analytical. They do best with colleagues who are competent, intelligent and productive. The best job for an INTJ is one where they are able to use their analytical skills to solve problems in challenging environments, and one where they can take responsibility for implementing their own ideas for creating efficient, innovative systems.
The analytical nature of INTJs will draw them to the number crunching required for this job. As organized individuals, INTJs will relish in keeping records balanced an in order. Since part of being an accountant includes suggesting ways to reduce costs, enhance revenues and improve profits, INTJs will enjoy formulating ideas to make those happen.
2. MathematicianSolving problems is the best description for this job. Whether opting to be an applied mathematician or a theoretical mathematician, both jobs require analytical juices to keep flowing in order to solve problems. Given that analysis and problem solving are two character features of an INTJ personality, a job that requires them to constantly think and come up with solutions is surely enticing.
3. ArchitectPlanning and designing houses, office buildings and other structures is a job made for INTJs. Whether it be making use of an awkward space or getting the most out of a very small space, architects make those happen and coming up with the right solutions is what an INTJ loves.
4. EconomistThe study of the production and distribution of resources, goods and services through collecting and analyzing data, researching trends and evaluating economic issues speaks to the INTJ. Analyzing collected data an coming up with recommendations to solve economic problems is what makes an INTJ tick.
5. WriterINTJs are often intellectuals and enjoy being in the company of like-minded individuals. What job could be more intellectual than that of a writer? Whether it be writing fiction or non-fiction, determination, critical thinking and creativity are INTJ traits that make them suitable candidates for this job.
6. Computer ProgrammerSimulating real-world scenarios and translating them to code is a major part of this job and who better to analyze and implement that than an INTJ? In case a bug is present in the system, the analytical skills of an INTJ will be very well put to use in finding that error and coming up with solutions on correcting it.
7. LawyerResearching and analyzing the legal problems of a client and finding solutions on properly representing them in court is a job suited for an INTJ. Be it working as criminal law attorneys, government counsels, corporate counsels, legal aid lawyers, environmental lawyers, tax lawyers, intellectual property lawyers, family lawyers, securities lawyers or litigation lawyers, determining relevant facts from large amounts of information and proposing viable solutions is a task an INTJ is up for.
8. Police DetectiveInvestigating crimes and analyzing the information gathered from interviews, records and observation is the life of a detective. Given that INTJs are analytical and love finding solutions, they will like the nature of detective work. Plus, there are specific crimes they can focus on, be it homicide or fraud. Whichever the case, their job remains the same: investigate until an arrest is made, a trial is completed or a case is dropped.
9. Physician or SurgeonIdentifying what is wrong with a patient and coming up with ways to cure them is a job description made for INTJs. Given that physicians can work in private offices or clinics, they tend to have a small staff of nurses and administrative personnel. Also, others practice independently or with a small group of doctors. Given that INTJs like working alone or with a small group, this kind of career will suit that side of their personality.
